What is self-awareness?

Exercise #1: Emotional awareness

1. Turn off distractions, including notifications, cell phones, television, or other possible distractions.

2. Take 3 deep breaths, inhaling for 4 seconds through your nose with your mouth closed. Pause for 4 seconds. Exhale through your nose for up to 8 seconds.

3. How are you currently feeling? Happy, sad, frustrated, angry, calm, energized… notice how you’re feeling.

4. Do not judge these feelings. They just are.

5. Where do you feel those feelings? In your stomach, chest, head, other… notice where you feel the feelings.

6. What triggered those feelings? Did something happen? Did you do or say something? Did someone else do or say something?… notice what triggered those feelings.

7. Do not judge what triggered these feelings. It just is.

8. How do you want to be feeling? The same? Different?… notice how you’d like to feel.

9. What will it take to feel that way? Deep breaths? A shift in mindset? A specific action? Something else?… notice your options.

10. Decide on the action you’d like to take or the new mindset you’d like to have.

11. Take action.

12. How do you feel now? Notice how you’re feeling. (Repeat as needed)

Exercise #2: Thought Awareness

1. Scenario: choose a recent situation that triggered a lot of thoughts. Do not choose a traumatic situation.

2. Visualize the situation. What was the environment? Who was there? Who said/did what? What was your response?

3. What do you think about the situation? It went well? It was challenging? It went sideways?… notice your thoughts.

4. Do not judge these thoughts. They just are.

5. What do you notice about the type of thoughts? Is it an inner critic or a saboteur? Is it a wise mentor guiding you? Or, something else?…notice the type of thoughts.

6. Name your thoughts. That’s my critical voice or that’s my worried voice, etc.

7. Be mindful. Take a deep breath or two. Rub your fingers together. Become present to this moment.

8. Assess and question your thought. What assumptions are being made? What’s true about the situation? What’s not true? Why am I thinking this way? What’s helpful about this thought? What’s harmful about this thought?

9. What do I want to think going forward? Visualize yourself thinking it.

10. What will it take to think that way? Deep breaths? A shift in mindset? A specific action? Something else?… notice your options.

11. Decide on the action you’d like to take or the new mindset you’d like to have.

12. Take action.

13. What do you think now? Notice what you’re thinking. (Repeat as needed)

These are two exercises in noticing emotions and thoughts. You can also practice mindfulness by doing the following exercises:

1. Deep breathing: close your eyes. Inhale through your nose for 4 seconds. Pause for 4 seconds. Exhale for up to 8 seconds. Repeat for 3 breaths. Then, breathe deeply, noticing your breath for as long as you like. Start with 5 minutes and work your way up to 20 minutes.

2. Touch: close your eyes. Rub your hands together, feeling each finger, each palm for roughly 10 times. Rub your fingers together on one hand, then the other for roughly 10 times, feeling the ridges of each finger.

3. Visual: look in front of you and pick an item to focus on. Look at the outer edges and move your way to the inner edges. Look at the finer details of the object. Spend 5 minutes looking at the object and noticing it.

4. Food: spend time eating each bite of food during a meal. Notice the color, the smell, the texture, and the taste of each bite.

Action: Choose 1 practice that you’d like to continue for the next 5 days, to increase your mindfulness. The Action Tracker can be found at the end of this chapter, in the Take Action lesson.